the headline act!

as a lot of you know, ive been fairly pissed with the world in general, over the past two days.... if i take it out on you.... im sorry (unless you're the faggin cause of it)

this rage and anger has been the result of the bad parts of the past year... i enjoy the good parts and suppress the bad... therefore i need the occasional outburst to keep me fairly sane.... (its my way....ineffective?: probably..... socially better?: for most of the year)

i think the thing that ive realised is that, i run on empty for most of the year..... my 'humor', although bland and frankly pathetic (consisting of inuendo's and snide comments), seems to be mustered up through sheer will power that i get from my really close mates.... for this, thanks guys..... you really are the only thing that keeps me going sometimes.

so, today im going to talk about myself (vain, i know :P)....and my stress levels:

so....as alot of my very close friends will tell you, it does take a hell of a lot to boil my blood (this isnt boasting, i just have a naturally high tolerance to people talking shit, and acting like dickheads)...... so you may (or may not) be interested to know that this week, several groups of people have succeded in making me feel the lowest common denominator.

lets begin :D
1) the group of people that think noise pollution is something other people make
2) the people who think just because they are above me in some way (not sexually im affraid), they also have the greater moral capability and also the ability to tell me im wrong....also failing to show me whats right.. (you people are just fucking special)
3) people who try and guilt trip me into doing something/saying something, like appologise, for things such as my behaviour, attitude, general feeling towards rules in a given situation...
4) people who start every conversation with the word 'dude'
5) my attitude because of the above (i do hate feeling like this)
.....ps..... this is just a flavour

one thing particularly this week, that seems to be getting to me is attention seekers: this breed of people seem to have the apparent inteligence to work out that if they seem sad and depressed for long enough, someone will look at them and give a shit.....this has the opposite effect on me.... you got a problem, tell me and i'll care..... if you assume i'll try get it out of you, i wont give a rodents rectum.
(btw, im not contradicting myself here..... im not asking for sympathy or anything.... i dont want the attention: im meerly trying to work through my own lil problems on my own..... but i wont hide it if asked)

also.......a pet peve: moaning.....if you're going to bitch about someone, fucking go for it! say names, tell me who's a slag, i dont give a toss....hit me with everything you've got.......i dont give a shit! but.....for the love of god and my sanity.....do not sit there with a pianed look on your face as if you're about to burst into tears, and tell me theres nothing wrong...... bollocks.
let me just clear the air here.....if there is something wrong, i guarentee you, 2 out of 3 people, i will gladdly help without further question or comment.....however....if getting the information from you is like getting a bodily fluid from a rock, then quite frankly, why the fuck should i care?


rant over :D

thought for the day

today in st martins, i got told off in their library for playing music on my phone, while NO-ONE else was in there.....i wasnt impeeding anyones working or disrupting them in any way..... and the librarian herself was doing her hair at this time.....
she came out of her little side office, into the library and said, 'what do you think your doing!....i cant believe you're doing that!.... how cheeky!'
i basicly sat there and said sorry miss at the appropriate times....not really knowing what else to do, while stiffling a laugh......

so my question for you: have you ever been shouted at, in a public convinience....ie: library, toilet, cinema...whatever

love you all (unless i hate you....or dislike you....or like you, but not in a way befitting the word/title, love.....etc)

CRA

the day after the night before.....

and so it seems another party, and another pissup.....featuring yet more hilarity as i get phone calls off drunken people telling im (quote) 'a priiiiickkkk cosh i didn teacsh guitarin to meee'(unquote)..... all im saying is his name began with B and ended with ENJAMINE.

and so to buisiness: gwyn, great party dude. nice 1 :D

and further to this act of kind words..... i did think that, earlier in the week, it was amazing that the Manic Street Preaches opened a new library in cardiff. this was brought about by the song 'design for life', where the first lyrics (i was fookin amazed when i realied this) are 'libraries give us power'!

fair do's like...brill song mind



now.....as i was saying......bed!
my bed is singularly my favourite place on the planet (not my bed physically, just the psycology of 'this is my bed for the night', regardless of shape, size or location)
it's a romance that has followed me all my life, and one that i doubtless think will remain with me for the duration of my time on this shit heap of a rock....(lovely thought)

(sorry, this is gona be a short one tonight coz i feel as though i should put my bed to good use)



straight into it: thought for the day
does anyone else think that the stig (revealed as michael schu... u know :P) was FAKEEE....
he cant be the bloody stig.....can he?....... FFS HE'S GERMAN!!!!......... and this dear friends is top gear.... no self respecting car lover could possibly employ a german..... they're far too precise!
gawd man!- this throws my entire concept of reality into the fire!

CRA

the profundity in profanity

sweet music in my ears of a summers day, may all my troubles fade away
like the chorus of the morning bird; now is gone: need not say a word...

or something like that :P






welcome dear fellows to another thrilling installment of 'look who cant spell words with more than 3 syllables'! today we'll be looking into dyslexia, and why it affects people (more specificly, me....but only when i'm writing blogs...)

but first, an appology: im sorry..... my last blog depressed some of you who read it (well its only going to be those who read it....durr). it was an emotional outburst which i will try and keep to myself....i realise that some of you readers (though few) must be wondering why im not funny anymore....well, for this, i also appologise....and i also say, 'fack off and what a comedian' :D

and so to business ladies and jellyspoons..... what a day to be alive hey XD
and have you heared........Ayatollah Khamenei thinks the UK is evil and unacceptable.....
i couldnt agree more you bastard

just check out this video on the BBC website:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8109303.stm

shit.......
so lets get this straight: the americans won the war in iraq..... we arent very good in the olympics..... we usually suck at eurovision..... (we pretty much fail at most things)..... BUT.....we are THE MOST evil western country.... (a small victory i feel XD......go us! (no not US) )

last time i checked, evil was a matter of perspective, and to condemn someone to the status of evil was both slanderous and fucking mean.... i reacon we should start a war against Ayatollah Khamenei .... not iran..... just him...

launch all of the UK and US's best military wepons, and aim them at his house....or cave.... whatever (yes this can be mildly construed as racisum.....but look, im still writing so this must prove something....i dont actually give a toss)

who want BBQ :P




no back to the usuall, less depressive, 'thought for the day!!!!!!'

short and sweet:
is it me, or does Grace Jones look like a transvestite....and a bad 1 at that.....
just look at this picture (adding pics doesnt work today for sum bloody inconvinent reason)
http://www.kalamu.com/bol/wp-content/content/images/grace%20jones%2015.jpg



so.....as ever: CRA (comment, rate, appreciate)

life's a beach.....

today, i thought, 'what the hell, i fancy a sex change'....so i went to the sea side :D

cold, wet, tired, risking hypothermia......but we're british, so we marched on, with a smile on our face and fire in our hearts..... till people started getting REALLY cold.....then we thought a tactical retreat was in order...

unfortunatly, the sanctity of sanity was fully booked, so we had to make do with a wet stretch of concrete....with guitars, food, and a football we stumbled upon....probably had AIDS on it, but we had a laugh!.... :P
was fun though...great time with great people. me and gwyn and jullian are official lovers by the way.

i wanted to talk about bed, today. the best invention since the condom. a place where anything can happen, from a first kiss, to building a little fort....watching tv, to watchin tv over the shoulder of the person you're having sex with...

bed is the only place you can feel warm and cozy and safe....untill it gets too hot and you realise its on fire...
you can curl up in it in the mornings and regress to a time when things were a damn sight simpler.....like aged 6 :P
dream in complete silence....or holding the person you love...its all gurd :D
just dont do a....yes thats right...-insert fanfair-.. a 'michael jackson'





and now for something different (here ends the funny):

tonight, im not going to leave you with a 'thought for the day'. instead im going to leave you with its brother: 'question for the day'

unfortunatly, i do feel this is cliched in all aspects....but i had to ask: has anyone had the 'perfect moment'? the space of time that you want to stop and re-live, but never change a thing....the one time in your existance that you fully appreciate everything, and see things as they are: how they are supposed to be perceived....and yet you are content with the world around you...not needing to question the wonder and unfathomable beauty of the landscape, the emelents, the company, and (at the heart of it) life.

if i told you that i had, i'd be a liar. to be enitrly honest....and to shatter the thoughts of others with my unquestionably high standards in this aspect....i dont think, annalysing everything, that i've even been in love at all.....let alone experienced perpetual bliss.
(a depressing concept that has made me feel hollow....but a true understanding of my mind and soul.)

to be allowed to enter my life, you have to be special. i have a thing about people who upset others.... if you do one thing to annoy me, then i do keep it locked inside.... if you persist in your annoyance, i let you know...... i have a very good memory and i am very good at lying to someones face. (something i am both proud and disgusted at myself about)

you call me hun, sexy, babe, darlin.....i judge you..... and more often than not, i have to resist the urge to walk away. i act. thats the only reason i am friends with several people. (you really dont know how much some people make me sad....actually sad. why cant we just get along in a way that makes me feel less like walking away from your tone, or the stuff that you say, or the general things that you do....?)

by the way, if i want to be your friend, i'll let you know....and i'll do this in a way that is visible to all... i'll comunicate in a normal way....... however there is a difference in me between friendship and avoiding social awkwardness......eg: i'd give my worst enemy the time, but i wouldnt hang out with him....

welcome to the land of mental perversion, where everthing is distorted in such a way as to make me lie to myself, that everything is ok....ive been doing it for years.... it's so easy to say 'i love you' or 'you really are amazing'....or anything....they're just words! and even the dumbest fool can make a lie seem real, even to himself: to train himself to believe it is fact, like 'i love you'.... only upon annalysing can he truly see what he has done to himself and others.

probably way too much said for one night: good luck digesting....if you so wish...



now....the prosecution has the floor: ........

Lewis Pearce: based on the original character by Charles Dickins

(and a stunned silence falls over the perplexed crowd!)- i aim to please :P

bonjour, and thank you for joining me on my voyage of discovery into the abyss....you'd better start writing your will now because with me at the helm, christ knows when we're getting back..

2 days hath passed since our last debarcal....2 days of nonchalance and disbelief at england winning the cricket.... 2 days of alright weather....2 days of knowing that somethings gonna give....and now we look at it and realise.....the thing that gave was....school.

(more importantly, lessons, and the sheer cheek the bloody teachers have of picking up a frigging text book, trying to pass on their knowlage to us, as if they were respectable adults....pfft! i shudder to think they get paid to stand there and reel off facts from books, they themselves know jack shit about! such a waste of good time.....)

soooo....it seems we find ourselves in the unfortunate possition again my comorades....you dont want to read this, i dont particularly want to write it..... if anyone says they DO want to read several hundred words, i have one word for you:

LIAR

but anyways........ i keep wanting to write something about a topic to spark some angst and aggression, along with a healthy dose of controversy.....but i fear this is too early to write about politics and religion......

all i will say on these topics so far is;

religion: anyone who doesnt take messages in religious texts, at face value, is a fool who i have no desire to share my oxygen with...please leave

politics: the shit has hit the fan people!

but the blog for today will consist of a question: should i continue to write these types of blogs, promoting humor at the expense of the masses....or should i write stuff from the heart, (depressing at times, humerous at others) mainly portraying myself in a light few of you have ever seen?

its tough for me because i never get into a situation that warents me opening up....and as research has shown.....over 26 percent of people older than a million, are dead......and that using a computer to write your feelings allows you to psycologically connect to your emotions in a way that face-to-face interaction cannot allow.

so....if people could get back to me....much appreciated

and the inevitable....thought for the day!

in 3-d

after much contemplation, i feel the name of 'britains got tallent' should be changed to the more suitable....'britain might have tallent somewhere but we cant find it so we'll exploit what we've got'....(thoughts?)

the one touching story i grasped from this whole manifestation of crap, was Susan Boyle....surely she is the benchmark......c'mon stig-of-the-dump.... aspire to be her!

all i can think of when i see her (cruel ino) is the conversation her parents had with the doctor after she was born.....

''congratulations mr and mrs boyle, its a beautifull boy!!.....wait... my mistake....it looks like some kind of wookie..... ah yes....its a grinch..... all i can say is, my appologies, and my condolances: what a truly unfortunate looking baby you have......you have my pitty.''

but she can FOOKING SING!!!!! ugly as sin with the voice of an angel.....god did fuck up, didnt he....

but after her stay in re-hab, we can but hope that this lady-of-the-night, disolves into our minds and back into the depths of obscurity from whence she came......

but here's a charming photo of her anyways :P

CRA peop's (and i mean everyone this time!)